My new book Here Comes the Drama: A Ferris and Sloan Story is live!
Ever seen a groom so drunk the venue owner had to hold him up for the cake cutting?
Yeah… it’s that kind of episode. Christa and Cora Lakey spill the tea on one of the wildest wedding stories ever submitted: Fireball shots, a missing glass eye, and a bride in tears.
From chaotic ceremonies to healing after heartbreak, this episode dives into what happens when boundaries vanish: on the aisle and in real life. Buckle up for celebrity breakups, red flags, and hard-earned lessons about love, growth, and protecting your peace.
Some weddings are beautiful. This one? Unforgettable.
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Episode Chapter Markers
00:00 Introduction
02:18 Life Updates: New Beginnings and Viral Stories
04:05 Crazy Wedding Stories and In-Law Drama
07:04 Celebrity Breakups and Social Media Facades
13:14 Marriage Realities and Setting Boundaries
24:44 The Bachelorette and Reality TV Drama
30:59 Red Flags vs. Green Flags: Bridal Party Edition
33:07 Discussing Red Flags in Wedding Stories
37:47 Wild Wedding Vendor Stories
40:32 The Drunken Groom Disaster
46:31 Derek’s Glass Eye Fiasco
50:11 Wedding Confessions and Boundaries
Must-Hear Insights and Key Moments
- Dream Dress Derailed – A bride’s excitement is crushed when her mom says she can’t buy the dress because of her “back fat.”
- Cora’s Divorce Diaries – Cora shares how six months post-divorce brought her more growth than six years of marriage.
- Celebrity Illusions – Why perfect celebrity couples (and Instagram lives) aren’t what they seem.
- In-Laws Behaving Badly – The real cost of not setting boundaries early.
- Wedding Horror Story of the Year – A groom too drunk to stand, a glass-eyed guest crawling on the dance floor, and a bride who ran off crying.
- Generational Shifts in Marriage – How modern couples are redefining partnership and equality.
- Healing After Heartbreak – Learning self-worth and the power of starting over.
- Red Flag vs. Green Flag Game – The outrageous bridal party moments that test your patience (and loyalty).
- Boundaries Aren’t Mean – Why saying no is the most loving thing you can do for yourself.
Words of Wisdom: Standout Quotes from This Episode
- “Boundaries aren’t mean. They’re how you take care of yourself—especially on your wedding day.” – Christa Innis
- “If someone’s money comes with strings attached, sometimes it’s better to say no.” – Christa Innis
- “Why do parents think they’re ‘giving us away’? I was already out living my life!” – Christa Innis
- “Your family should make you feel good on your wedding day, not add to the drama.” – Christa Innis
- “You deserve a wedding that feels like you—not a performance for everyone else.” – Christa Innis
- “Don’t accept money if it means losing control of your own wedding.” – Cora Lakey
- “I walked myself down the aisle because it felt right for me—that’s what matters.” – Cora Lakey
- “The people who push your boundaries usually have the strongest ones themselves.” – Cora Lakey
- “Weddings expose family dynamics in ways you can’t ignore—but it makes you stronger.” – Cora Lakey
- “Your wedding day is the perfect time to start doing things your way, no apologies.” – Cora Lakey
*This conversation is for entertainment and informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. Please seek a licensed professional for your specific situation.
About Cora:
Cora Lakey is a lifestyle content creator and social media influencer who shares thoughtful reflections on wellness, personal growth, and life experiences, including navigating her divorce. She actively produces content on YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram, offering guidance and inspiration in areas such as self-care, emotional healing, healthy living, and mental well-being. Beyond sharing tips, she cultivates a supportive online community, engaging with followers to foster personal growth and resilience. Cora also adapts her content strategy across different platforms, blending storytelling, practical advice, and authentic insights to connect with a broad audience while encouraging positive lifestyle changes.
Follow Cora:
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A Team Dklutr Production
Blog Transcript:
Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies
Christa Innis: Hi Cora.
Cora Lakey: Hi
Christa Innis: Krista. Thank you so much for coming back on. I’m so excited.
Cora Lakey: Thanks for having me back. I feel like it’s such an honor to be on more than once, so super excited.
Christa Innis: I feel like we just had so much fun last time we were just talking and it was like, old friends hanging out and we read crazy stories and just we wanna spill more tea.
Cora Lakey: Yeah. Yeah. I’m excited to spill with you or hopefully hear more tea. I feel like the stories we covered were crazy last time. Yes. So can’t wait.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
well I’m so excited to have you back on. I know I just said that, but I feel like last time it just like flew so well.
and what’s new for anyone that I did not listen to? Last episode When you came on, what’s new? Who are you? Tell us about yourself.
Cora Lakey: Yeah, so a lot has changed since I was last on. I feel like I have a new name, new life, which is crazy. So I think last time we were together I was still in the Bay Area, just like kind of having my life implode.
my divorce was kind of just starting and now I’m six months in it. I’m living on my own for the first time in my life. I have two dogs and I think we got connected on TikTok. So I primarily post on TikTok, which is maybe how my audience knows me. And I first went viral there for a wedding story time that maybe could have been featured on this show.
and maybe it was an omen for the marriage working out, but you know, to give me a whole new. Career and, a lot of great relationships like with you, so, yeah.
Christa Innis: yeah. It’s funny all the stories like that get sent to me and like, I always wanna do like, follow up segments with people too, to be like, I feel like yours.
What had to do more with like, bridesmaids, right. And like a friend fallout. But like, a lot of times when I like hear about these crazy, like in-law stories that are sent to me, I’m like, I wanna follow up with people and be like, did the marriage work? Sometimes they tell me like, oh, this is my ex-husband story, or This is my ex we never made it down the aisle or something.
‘ cause I’m like, some of these stories are so insane where I’m like, how could you put up with that for a marriage? Knowing your in-laws hate you, or a sister-in-law hates you? that sounds like hell to me. That sounds terrible. Yeah.
Cora Lakey: And I mean, people are sneaky and I feel like, yeah, you just never know.
And I feel like if people are having those signs before they even walk down the aisle, it’s only gonna progressively get worse. So I agree. I wanna hear the updates. So anyone listening, give us the updates your lives. Yes.
Christa Innis: I know I’ve had a couple like brides come on and let me like, ask them any questions.
They come on anonymously and spill some stuff. but it was funny, one time someone came on and, she was like, yeah, things are, better than like where they left off. And then we like hung up and like, where we stopped recording and she was honestly, like things are like getting kind of worse again.
But like, I don’t wanna say anything yet because I’m not sure. I’m like, oh my gosh. like what is going on? Like there’s just, I don’t know, people deal with a lot of stuff in relationships.
Cora Lakey: Is it crazy? You never know what’s going on behind closed doors. And I feel like I’ve been trying to toe that fine line ’cause I’ve been talking about my divorce publicly, but I obviously haven’t said like the actual reasons publicly because you know, A, it’s no one’s business and I think there’s a fine line with creators, but BI think it’s like, I don’t wanna make anyone, I guess like second guess things going on in their relationships because you just never know what’s happening.
And even like the little tidbits I’ve shared, it is crazy. Like the dms I’ll get of like, oh my gosh, I’ve been through that too. Or I’ve experienced that scenario and on paper they look so happy. Or I’ll get messages from, you know, people with all their wedding pictures and they look so in love and they send me the craziest confessions.
I’m like, oh my gosh. So if you’re ever comparing yourself to anyone, like you really just can’t because there’s a reason why 50% of marriages end in divorce. You just never know what’s going on. And I think that’s especially important for me being 31 now and kind of starting my life over, like I want women to see my story and see other women that maybe, aren’t where they thought they’d be in life and feel encouraged because it’s such a beautiful chance to start over.
And also, like you just never know what you’re comparing yourself to. You’re only looking at the most glamorized version of people’s lives online, and sometimes it can be really easy to fall into that trap. So yeah, it is really crazy what that people don’t share. But when they do share.
Christa Innis: Yes, I know. It’s like that social media comparison game of like, you never really know what lives people are living because they wanna put up a facade or like, they just want things to look pretty.
And then that’s why like, I think a lot of times, like people are shocked with like celebrity divorces or celebrity breakups because they’re like, they look so perfect and beautiful and like blah, blah blah. And it’s like, well, we’re only seeing them as like a celebrity. You know, we’re seeing them in a movie or we’re seeing them on a red carpet.
We’re not like in their home. So we’re not, we’re only seeing what they wanna put out, you know? Right.
Celebrity Splits & Secret Friendships
Cora Lakey: Are we gonna talk about Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban?
Christa Innis: I was actually thinking that when I first said that, I was like, what? Because they’re like the og. They’ve together
Cora Lakey: a while. I know, I don’t know when this is gonna air, but in real time this is like breaking of like all the details coming out.
I can’t believe it. That’s a great example. You just never know what’s going on behind the scenes. They seemed so in love and dang, I’m shocked. I thought nothing would shock me anymore.
Christa Innis: But because I feel like in like celebrity or Hollywood years, even 10 years, even five years sometimes is like in celebrity marriages, that’s like a long time.
’cause it just happened so quickly. So they were going on 20 years almost. so have you heard anything else like about it? Like details come out.
Cora Lakey: There’s allegedly the Nashville community is saying there’s allegedly another woman that is involved. I don’t know how true that is, but I guess we’ll find out more.
It seems like day by day, but so today as we’re filming Nicole filed, which is interesting. Okay. So I think details are to come, but I can’t believe it. It’s so sad.
Christa Innis: Yeah, I know it. I had to take a double take. Wasn’t there? What other there was just another celebrity divorce, I feel like, where there was, oh, not divorce, a breakup.
Sean White and yes. Yes. I just saw that last week. And there’s all these cheating rumors about like he’s like dealt with cheating in the past. So I don’t know if it was directly on her, but now all these things are coming out. But again, this is all a legend. I don’t know, a legend, but all the players listening.
Yeah, they were always a shocking couple to me because I remember hearing things about him years ago that he was kind of like, full of himself. I mean,
Cora Lakey: I think just living in LA you hear stuff, So I’ve definitely heard some interesting stories about him as well. What man Who fumbles Nina Dore, you know, no matter what happened, it’s like, I know she seems amazing.
She’s so successful. Gorgeous, so funny. What a bummer. Yeah, I know. Yeah, that one shocked me too.
Christa Innis: Yeah. But then you, like I saw her on a back. Yeah, it’s true. Well, and then I just, I saw a post of her, she was like on a boat with like miles teller and like Zach Efron and someone else, and I was like, okay, she’s good, she’s fine.
Cora Lakey: You know what I find more interesting than the breakups is like the friend breakups, and I don’t know if there’s any substance there, but speaking of the tellers, and we have Taylor Swift’s album coming out on Friday. What’s going on there? What happened to Kelly Tellers? I don’t know. They’re just like, maybe they are.
But I’ve been thinking about that because Taylor’s obviously engaged.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm. Which was
Cora Lakey: another shock. I feel like we could just do like a top five wedding stories on this episode. Yeah. I swear so much is happening. But I’ve been thinking about who Taylor Swift bridesmaids would be, and they were super close at one point and now never see them together.
And like Yeah. I feel like Kelly would always post music in her tiktoks.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cora Lakey: Now, no, he was even
Christa Innis: in one of her music videos.
Cora Lakey: Yes. Yes, she was. Yeah. Miles was too. So I’m like, what? What’s the T there? That’s what I wanna know.
Christa Innis: Yeah, I find that interesting too. well, and then the whole, like her and Blake Lively aren’t friends anymore, which is wild.
But also like, I feel like, I don’t know, it’s like once they get so big, it’s. They all have to have these really big egos probably. And it’s just like, don’t cross me. Don’t do, I don’t know, like, and then the lawyers get involved and it’s like messy and I’m sure there’s a lot of like secret friendships too that we don’t know about because like they just know the paparazzi’s gonna talk or media’s gonna talk and maybe there’s some that they wanna preserve to themselves.
Cora Lakey: Yeah. Protect your peace. Yeah, I completely understand that. Yeah. I feel like the tellers in particular are really good at like from what we see publicly, having those really good, substantial relationships. And they seem like they’re good friends, so love that they’re protecting Nina during this time. But yeah, that was a crazy one too.
Yeah. I mean, better, I don’t know your opinion on this, but I feel like it’s better to cut it off before the engagement if something’s going wrong than too late. And I think when you are. Yeah, just for, not even celebrity wise, but normal person wise, it’s so hard when financially you have so much involved in a wedding and you’re like, oh my gosh, I have to see this through, even though I don’t think it’s gonna work.
And yeah, it’s kind of sad.
Red Flags, Boundaries, and Toxic Wedding Tales
Christa Innis: Yeah. I’ve heard so many stories, like some have been sent to me that are like, they saw all the red flags during the engagement and the wedding planning, but then they felt like they had to keep going. Not necessarily just to like prove a point. But they were like, we put money in already, so like we just have to do it.
But like the one skit, which again, like by the time this comes out, I might be done with this skit, but this one skit I’m doing right now, it’s so long because of like the story that was sent to me and it’s like super toxic in-laws. Like I’m talking like the dad bought wedding dresses for the bride to try on from Amazon, and she was like, already said no, like, I’m going with my mom.
And he’s like, but these are cheaper, they’re more affordable. she’s like, I never said I need your help with a wedding dress. And then the mom like, bought, paid for the venue without talking to them first. Oh. So all this stuff, and I’m just thinking, I’m like, how do you like deal with something like that?
Like, I can’t even imagine you, I’m like, at least people like keep commenting. Like, they’ve gotta cancel the wedding, they’ve gotta cancel the wedding, but in the actual story, they get married. So I can only imagine what happens after. You know, it’s like, I don’t know, we hear all these like stories like growing up, it’s like Disney and all these, you know.
Things like that, where it’s the happily ever after. So we think you get to the marriage and that’s the finish line, but it’s like, no, that’s when your life continues or starts, or there’s so much more after it, and I feel like we’re just, yeah. Oh, like zoned.
Cora Lakey: Yeah. Oh my gosh. I mean, that is scary.
I feel like it just gets worse too when you have kids. I’m sure it’s like if they’re already poking the bear and kind of trying to assert what their boundaries are. Like once those people become grandparents, oh my gosh, you’re kind of locked in and Yeah, man, I don’t know. I feel like you marry your in-laws and that’s something that’s not talked about enough.
And yeah, if your spouse is not setting those boundaries with them, like, I mean, everyone has different boundaries, but you kind of have to gauge your comfortability with that. And I feel like I hear a lot of stories of men that don’t protect their wives with their in-laws. I mean mm-hmm. We all know some of my lore, but it’s crazy like what people think is appropriate and what isn’t.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm. Yeah. And it’s like if you don’t put boundaries in place ahead of time, then they keep like sneaking in or it’s, what’s that phrase where it’s like if you give them an inch, they’ll take a mile. Right. So it’s like if you are just like you say yes to things here and there, we see it time and time again.
But yeah. You bring up a good point too. It’s like once babies come, if they choose to have kids, then that’s a whole, like if they were badgering wedding planning, just imagine when you create a life that has their DNA Yeah. They think they have a right to that child. It’s wild.
Cora Lakey: Yeah. I feel like something I’ve really learned just through this last year and through my own, I guessI’m in like my, not to sound woowoo, but like my healing journey, just actively going through a divorce and I think it’s really opened my eyes to the fact that a lot of people wanna be married, but they’re not necessarily ready for what marriage is.
And I think generationally as well, that can apply to your in-laws, right? Like how things were done 20, 30, 40 years ago isn’t acceptable now. Right. And it’s about setting the foundation well because the person that you marry is going to see your parents die. They’re gonna see the worst days of your life.
there’s like just so many things that happen, like so many seasons of life that they’re supposed to be. They’re with you for, and it’s kind of crazy that I think a lot of people just wanna check the box of saying they’re married, so they’re like, oh my God, I don’t have to do this anymore, rather than really committing to what a marriage is and
Christa Innis: mm-hmm.
Cora Lakey: I mean, yeah, I just, the confessions I get too, it’s like I really don’t wanna tell people what to do ’cause I only see a limited view of what’s happening, but Right. I don’t, I would be comfortable with certain situations that I hear about.
Christa Innis: Yeah. And you bring up a good point about like what was okay or maybe like people allowed more and our parents generation is not okay now I think a lot more of us are looking for more equal partnership and if they come from a more traditional background where it’s like, maybe it was the mom stayed home and the dad went to work and, she’s expected to clean, you know, do his laundry and do all the dishes and do all that and cook and maybe.
That’s not what their life looks like. And I’m like, I see that all the time where it’s like, you see like people post about well, I work a full-time job and my husband does, so like we should split the home stuff. And it’s like, that is like a whole thing that the older generation doesn’t get.
’cause they’re like, well no, that’s not her job. Her job is this. You know? and that’s hard for people to come to terms with,
Cora Lakey: and especially with like a situation with maybe in-laws that don’t respect your boundaries, it’s like, oh my gosh, it makes everything amplified when they’re making things 10 times worse by asserting those opinions if there are those fractures in your relationship.
So yeah,I can’t even imagine. Glad I’m not dealing with that right now, but Thinking about that for the next phase of life? For sure.
Christa Innis: Yes, definitely things you can like, look out for. It’s like, I will say, and again, people change like, you know, sometimes unluckily, like once you get married or like as you date people and stuff. I will say my in-laws have always been amazing. Like, I met them within a, I wanna say like the first five days of meeting my husband.
Cora Lakey: What?
Christa Innis: yeah. he was like so excited and they were like having like people over for a barbecue anyway. And he like brought me there and, I don’t know, I was never used to like parents like his, like, they were just like, so like, interested in like, getting to know me and they were like so welcoming and they were like, right off the bat were just like, really cool.
I got really lucky. So when I read these stories, I’m just like, how? I don’t know. that’s why I can’t comprehend how people like. Stay with someone with terrible, like in-laws. ‘ cause I just, I’m not confrontational. Like I can feel tension when it’s like bad. I just don’t like it. And so if every time I had to go like see my in-laws and I was like, oh, they hate me.
Like, I couldn’t imagine that would be Yeah. So uncomfortable. I feel for his brides and
Cora Lakey: Right. It’s always the guys that like bring nothing to the table that have the worst parents. You’re like, what? Like you’ll hear these stories Andre, their whole life. Yeah. what did they bring to the relationship?
It sounds like you’re doing everything.
Christa Innis: Yes. They did their laundry till he was 28 or whatever.
Gardener or the Rose: Redefining Love After Divorce
Cora Lakey: Exactly. Exactly. Oh my gosh. I feel like I heard a really good saying on TikTok where it was like every relationship, there’s a season where there you have to be like the gardener or the rose and the roles can change.
And I feel like that’s a really big thing in relationships that I’m definitely looking forward to. It’s like in some seasons of life, you’re fully the gardener and maybe someone else needs more support, but it’s the ability to shift those roles and have the flexibility to shift those roles that I think is so important.
So, I Yeah. Like, I think it’s possible. And I, I just wanna encourage anyone listening that maybe you’ve been through a broken engagement or a divorce. There’s resilience and positivity and so much growth that happens through that. And I feel like this has been like the hardest six months of my life, and like the loneliest, but it’s also been the most growth, right?
Like, I think when I was married, I almost felt like I, it was like six months or six years of just like, wanting change and wanting, my life to change should be different and just feeling stuck. Mm-hmm. And in the six months, I feel like I’ve grown more than I have in the last six years, which is insane.
So, can develop and grow and change and maybe things don’t work out, but there’s still lessons out of that and there’s love on the other side of that. It’s great, and I’m surprised, like I feel like I was really scared to start dating again. I’m definitely very lightly looking like, not like actively seeing anyone, but I thought people would judge me so much for being divorced.
And it’s literally like doesn’t even phase guys, they’re just like, oh, okay. Like, which I was really surprised by. So if anyone’s like thinking about it or they’re like, oh my God, I don’t know, like I kind of want a divorce, but I’m too scared. It’s like, it’s actually not as bad as I thought it would be. On the other side, it’s like hard.
But dating wise, I’ve been very pleasantly surprise
Christa Innis: Good. I’m sure you’re like learning a lot about yourself too, especially like first time living alone, and I feel like a lot of times we like move from one thing to the next without really like absorbing like, is this making me happy or do I wanna do something different?
And like, we just kinda like, like you said earlier, like check the boxes. And so I’m sure you’re like really able to like, ask yourself those questions and be like, I’m just in your era of learning about myself and what actually is important to me?
Cora Lakey: Yeah. Yeah.have a crystal clear definition of what I want in a partner and I’m just not gonna settle for anything less than that.
And I think as women we naturally talk ourselves out of things or we’ve, been coached to kind of like settle for things and it’s like we really don’t need to, we’re so multifaceted, we’re so successful on our own. A man should only add value to your life and should add to your life, period. He shouldn’t detract from be sucking your life force out.
Right. And mm-hmm. Especially when they’re the father of your children. That’s gonna be especially critical because it’s those make or break moments in life that like you’re really gonna see who they are. And so yeah, I feel like I’m really crystal clear on what I want in a partner and I feel like before I was like, maybe I want this, maybe I want that, maybe I’ll be flexible.
And I’m like, no, I can provide that for myself and
Christa Innis: mm-hmm.
Cora Lakey: I want a man to be welcome addition to my life, not to provide something for me, for my life, Yeah. That alone is such a big lesson that made it all worth it, I guess.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I feel like all along we were taught, like growing up to look for the wrong things.
And not, maybe that’s a little general, but you know what I mean? Like the movies where it’s like the Prince Charming, they’re just like talking about like they look this way, they, I don’t know, whatever it is. Like they have all this money or they have this certain job or they have this, you know, and it’s like, but what beneath the surface, can they actually offer us?
Are they gonna be there when we need them for something? Are they going to support us in our own dreams and goals? Are they gonna be a good father and actually want to like be hands on? Or are they just gonna expect you to, you know, like those kind of things are the things we have to like think about, I think ahead of time.
definitely. I just had to think like 12 times.
Cora Lakey: And I think all of those lessons, which is interesting, like all those stories that are presented to little girls is all about how they react. Mm-hmm to these guys, they’re just put in your lap and it’s like, okay, well that’s look a Quasimodo. Like, Esmeralda was so vain for not being attracted to him.
And it’s like, well, okay, but like why is it on her to react that way? Or like, I don’t know. There’s just so many stories like Beauty and the Beast, right? It’s like all about why are we molding ourselves and pivoting to what society’s expectations are? It’s so strange to me and why it’s always, okay, let’s see how she reacts let’s see if she’s vain.
Let’s see if she’s, gonna put up with this. And it’s like, no, Why is Bell being, put in a situation where she’s being verbally abused and kidnapped and now she has to be okay with spending her life with this person. It’s insane. She’s been pleaser. It’s prelim mess.
Christa Innis: Exactly. Just be the caretaker. Exactly. Take care of the guy that like kidnapped you and fall in love with him because he had told me. Nice for you. Yeah. Wow. Oh my God. Give him the benefit of the doubt. It’s fine.
Cora Lakey: Yeah. You’re expected to be perfect and beautiful and smart, poised and the whole package, but it’s okay if he is literally an abuser.
Christa Innis: Right.
Cora Lakey: Okay. You know? Yeah. Yeah. I think those,stories do get into psyche of little girls and you grow up and you are like, oh my gosh, I’m so behind ’cause I’m not, married at 30 and I don’t have a kid. And it’s like, oh my gosh. those things do get to you later in life, so Yeah. Silly as it might sound, it does add up.
Christa Innis: Yeah. Yes. Everyone’s got their own timeline. okay, I added a couple, a new segment this time, but I know we also wanna talk really quickly before we get to that. Let’s talk about the new Bachelorette from Mom talk.
Cora Lakey: I’m so excited I’ll actually be watching.
The Bachelorette Twist We Didn’t See Coming
Christa Innis: Yeah. So what are your thoughts? Are you a big mom talk, secret Life?
Secret Lives? Yes. Secret Lives and Mormon wives a watcher. I’m huge.
Cora Lakey: Like I’m their biggest fan. I will move to Utah and join Mom Talk. I love that. Like that is the only thing that could get me to watch The Bachelor Bachelorette again. It was getting so stale and I feel like a, B, C just never listens when the audience gives them feedback, so finally they do something interesting.
What I thought was interesting, a couple points that people have brought up is like, there’s almost a double standard with Taylor where she wouldn’t have passed the background check to go on the show. Right? Mm-hmm. And that is a big thing. Even though the case was dismissed against her. And if anyone doesn’t know what we’re talking about, like you can look it up.
But that is an interesting point. Like are they gonna be more flexible with the contestants because of that? Another point people brought up is like, why not one of the other girls? What about Layla or Miranda? I feel like they’d be great.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Cora Lakey: So I don’t know, did they pick the right person? Is Miranda, did they not?
Christa Innis: Is Miranda the blonde that just joined season two? Okay. So I was like die hard, love season one. I just have not gotten around to watching season two, which I feel like has been out. I’m so behind. Oh, to my God. I think I watched the first like two episodes and I was like, okay. I just like have, I need to find the time.
But I. Loved Taylor season one. And then some of my friends say it kinda like changes. And now I like love Whitney, but I don’t really like see her. I just see her on social media and I see her on Dancing With the Stars when I catch her. And I just love her like vibe. I don’t know what it is. I love her vibe now.
I did not season one, so yeah, that is really interesting. It’s,
Cora Lakey: you
Christa Innis: know what,
Cora Lakey: it’s interesting how interchangeable the characters are, right, of like, who’s the villain, who’s not. that was the biggest takeaway I had from season two. Not to spoil for you, but like, yeah, it’s like you would think Whitney Clear cut villain and all of a sudden it’s like, oh nevermind.
She’s fine. And yeah, so it’s crazy. We just, I guess we’ll have to see what happens, but yeah, it’s gonna be a good,
Christa Innis: you know what I mean? It’s funny because when I first, to be all honest, when I first saw them announced Taylor as The Bachelorette because I saw Alex Cooper’s like teaser. And I saw it and I was like, what?
That’s kind of disappointing. ’cause I was like, all these women that aren’t in reality TV yet, that are like, want the chance, you know? But then I thought about it and what you said. I’m like, I don’t watch Bachelorette anymore. I have not watched in years because I was just so like bored of it and it just didn’t make sense for me.
Oh, did we freeze?
Okay. I’m trying to think of where I was talking about. we’re having internet issues for those of you listening. but yeah, I just feel like, like saying like you were potentially a little Yeah, so I was saying like, when I first saw it, I was like kind of shocked ’cause I was like, oh, there’s so many women that wanna go on that have not been in the reality TV world.
So I feel like when they like, carry people over from one show to the other, I’m just like, ah, come on. Like, there’s so many people out there that want a chance. But then when I thought about it, I’m like, I haven’t watched Bachelorette in years, Bachelor or Bachelorette, I don’t even know who season I watched last, honestly.
And I’m like, it was kind of boring and it needed a little excitement. So for TV entertainment purposes only, not for like morality or for like, whoever it should be. I was like, I can see Taylor being a good choice. ’cause I was like, people are gonna watch.
Cora Lakey: Mm-hmm. My problem is I am so cynical that I just assume anyone who wants to be a contestant on either of those shows wants social media fame. Mm-hmm. Which, nothing wrong with that, right? Like it’s a grind out here. But that’s what I’m really worried about with Taylor because that’s a big storyline on season two of Secret Lives of Mormon wives is she is.
When you get down to the nitty gritty, like she’s very pure of heart and she really doesn’t care about the monetary side of it. She just enjoys her life. She enjoys the opportunities that mom talk has provided, but she’s not, I guess, fame hungry, which is really refreshing and I worry that her announcement is going to attract.
The wrong type of guy that just wants fame. Mm-hmm. Because it’s already been a huge issue on the Bachelor franchise. And I feel like they know there is a built in huge following. And I mean, I’ve had negative experiences with Bachelor Bachelorette contestants, like on social media just being fame hungry, like people citing in my dms about collabs and just being super weird and I have like no following.
So I’m like, as someone with 4 million followers, like you do need to think of that stuff. It’s like, are these people just trying to be famous or do they genuinely want to be with her?
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm.
Cora Lakey: It’s a little bit scary to think about.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I was just talking to someone a couple weeks ago on the podcast about like reality TV and what it’s turned into, and I feel like a lot of people do go on just to get that platform and be famous now.
Cora Lakey: But yeah, I’m sure even more so with someone that already has a big following, they’re gonna be these guys that are gonna be desperate for the limelight. Yeah, I agree. I agree. And it’s almost ruined reality TV because people are just going on reality tv, it seems like, to amplify their brands, but then they’re so scared of getting canceled.
They don’t act organic on tv. And I think that’s what’s been so refreshing about Taylor and the secret lives of Mormon wives girls, is they don’t care. So I really hope that doesn’t happen this season. I know, I feel like Taylor’s no BS and she’s going to see it right away, but I don’t know. I’m kind of scared for her.
The Bachelorette Confessions We Can’t Believe Happened
Christa Innis: Yeah, it’ll be interesting for sure. Okay. I wanna get into the next segment before we get too far. ’cause I know we’re already like far in, so you can let me know if you have a cutoff, there’s just a little like this or that section and then we’ll get to this week’s story if that’s cool.
Yeah. okay, so this next one is red flag versus green flag, and this is groomsman bridal party edition. So just say red flag or green flag based on the scenario. Okay. A bridesmaid gets drunk at the bachelorette and admits she hooked up with the groom right before he started dating the bride.
Cora Lakey: Oh my God. Definitely not a green flag. I don’t know. I mean, keeping that secret.
Christa Innis: Shitty and
Cora Lakey: then neither of them bringing it up again.
Christa Innis: Yeah,
Cora Lakey: oof. Want orange,
Christa Innis: that’s for sure. Yeah, I know. I’m like, I’m that person. I have so many questions because I’m like, why are you waiting until the bachelorette party and you never like told your friend like, Hey, by the way this happened, but I don’t know when the night, right.
Like right time would be like if they start dating and you’re like, Hey, just so you know. But then things are always would be weird, I feel like.
Mm-hmm.
Cora Lakey: Yeah. I guess it’s so dependent on the friend group and their comfortability, their situation. I mean, we were literally just talking about secret lives of Mormon wives, and that’s something actively happening on secret lives of Mormon wives.
Christa Innis: Really.
Cora Lakey: Layla dated one brother and dating another brother, and they’re both totally cool with it.
So. I guess it depends on what they dated. The same
Christa Innis: brother, they stated the same brother, or they just dated brothers?
Cora Lakey: No, Layla is dating. She’s dated the brothers now she’s dating the other brother. Yeah. So it’s like, that’s a weird situation, but that’s weird. Fine with it. Yeah, I, I wouldn’t be comfortable with that.
So, I mean, I guess it depends, but yeah, I feel like your husband or fiance keeping that from you and your friend, it’s like, why?
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm. Very
Cora Lakey: curious.
Christa Innis: Yeah. That’d be a little, maybe red. Yeah. And the timing would make me not happy. Okay. Next one. The maid of honor disappears mid bachelorette with a random guy taking the itinerary decorations and matching outfits with her.
Cora Lakey: Are these real?
Christa Innis: No, I just make ’em up. Like
Cora Lakey: these things have happened. Okay. I was like, oh my God, I need more background. psychotic. Why? Like, why red? That’s super strange.
Christa Innis: I should say. Like, why did she steal all this stuff? So I should say all of these are like inspired by story sent to us, but like we, like, obviously people don’t send me like, oh, here, this or that, but like, they’re inspired.
Like, someone sent me a story once where the maid of honor wanted to go meet up with a guy when they were at their bachelorette. So they are inspired, but like very loosely. Yeah.
Cora Lakey: Okay. Only a red flag. Like is he having a bachelorette party? Why do you need all that stuff right now?
Christa Innis: photos from the groom’s bachelor party leaked.
He ended up at a strip club. He swore he didn’t want to go to
Cora Lakey: red. Red. No. Unless it’s the hangover. And he literally is unconscious in the photos. No excuse. Yes.
Christa Innis: Bridesmaid’s phone lights up at 2:00 AM during the bachelorette and it’s the groom texting her just to vent a bridesmaid.
Christa Innis: What, what?
Cora Lakey: I guess if it’s his sister. Sure. Right. Or his cousin. But what, what’s wrong with these men? No,
Christa Innis: red. I’m like, these are so red. The groom secretly invited his ex to the bachelor party and the groomsmen let it slide.
Cora Lakey: Red reds of the mall. No. Ew. The thing is, I can so see something like this happening and no. No,
Christa Innis: I know. I’m sure a lot. Yeah. It’s funny too, ’cause like anytime I read like outlandish things like this, someone will comment like, yeah, that happened to me. That happened at a wedding I was at happened. so it’s like no matter how outlandish it is, like these things happen.
It’s just wild. like I had one where the mother-in-law invited the son’s ex to the wedding as her plus one. She’s like, I get a plus one. I can invite whoever I want i’s wild.
Cora Lakey: but anyone who would willingly do that on either side, the mother-in-law or the ex willing to go to the wedding, it’s just like, how bored are you in your life that you have to cause that?
Christa Innis: Yes.
Cora Lakey: Insane fear.
Christa Innis: Like everyone, anyone that does that knows that’s not okay. So you are asking for, you want attention, you want to make someone feel bad or you wanna be a bully or something. Like, there’s no, you can’t be like, oh, I didn’t know that was not acceptable. Like, come on. You know, that’s not okay.
It’s insane. Okay. I’ll do one more and then we’ll get into the story. Okay. the groom sister, who’s a bridesmaid complains nonstop about the cost and threatens to drop out every other week.
Cora Lakey: I almost turned like passive aggressive suite in those situations. Like a kill ’em with kindness type thing because you wanna turn it on them to offer them the out that you wanna give them. Like you don’t want them to be a bridesmaid. So you say, you know, I understand weddings are a huge financial burden.
If it doesn’t work for you, no worries. I can take that off your plate. Mm-hmm. Turn it on them. You voiced how uncomfortable you are. Like, I wanna be there for you. You should just enjoy it as a guest. Don’t worry about a gift. We just wanna have you there. But I get it.
Christa Innis: Yeah. That’s like the perfect way to respond to someone like that.
’cause again, it’s like they’re probably just doing it for attention or they’re unhappy about something. So that’s the best way to do it. Be like, hey, totally understand. If you don’t wanna be a part of it, that’s fine. You’ll still be there and all the wedding photos, whatever. Yeah.
Cora Lakey: Yeah. Perfect. That’s all you can do.
It’s hard in those situations ’cause you also wanna be fair and equitable to your other bridesmaid too. Mm-hmm.
Christa Innis: So it’s
Cora Lakey: like, okay, if I’m paying for this one person’s way, it’s like. Then I really have to pay for everyone else’s way too to make it fair. So it’s kind of hard. You can’t really cherry pick situations like that.
So you kind of do have to lay down the hammer, I feel like. Yeah, definitely. Even if it’s mean, sorry.
Take a Shot, Take a Seat… and Then Everything Went Off the Rails
Christa Innis: Yeah. Boundaries aren’t mean. They’re just being firm. Yeah. I love it. all right. Let’s blind react to this week’s wedding story submission. This is a true story that someone sent to me, so here we go.
Feel free to stop me at any point, or we’ll just kind of react along the way. Okay. “We knew right away this wedding wasn’t going to be boring. At the top of the aisle, there was a big sign that read, take a shot and take a seat. About seven years ago, my husband and I had just moved into our new house. On weekends, we picked up part-time jobs at a local wedding venue, easy money and something for me to do while my husband worked shifts at his full-time job. At that point, I had already been in the wedding industry for a while, teaching couples their first dances and coordinating a few weddings for friends. So working at a venue felt pretty natural at this wedding. This one is always the story I tell because you just can’t make this stuff up. The day started out like any other staff arrived. We set up and everything was on schedule. The ceremony was supposed to be outside, but because of rain we had to move it under the covered reception area. The guest list was about 120 people, pretty standard for that venue. As we were setting up, we noticed a big bag of Fireball shots next to the sign that said, take a shot and take a seat. The bride and groom wanted every guest to grab one before the ceremony began.” So this is a party. They wanna start the party off early. Wow. I also love that this is a wedding vendor story because we don’t get a ton of them.
It’s normally like the bride or a bridesmaid. So this is like a cool different perspective. Okay, it says, “as we worked, one guest caught our attention. He wore bright coral pants and a loud floral shirt. For the sake of the story, let’s call him Derek. Derek showed up nearly two hours early and went straight to the bar asking for a drink.
Now the venue policy was no drinks until cocktail hour, so we politely told him no. But Derek did not like that answer. He marched off to find the groom and somehow convinced the wedding party to give us permission to serve him early. Not exactly standard protocol, but when the couple says yes, you follow their wishes.”
I’m wondering if they’ve standard protocol because of people like this. So I’m like, how did that guy convince them to change that? It’s probably not a good idea.
Cora Lakey: as a former wedding vendor, I question that honestly. ’cause you know those insurance contracts, like there’s no way if that guy fell down the stairs or something, they wouldn’t be like, well, protocol, it changes.
Like, no.
Christa Innis: Yeah, I know. I’m like, those are in place for a reason.
Cora Lakey: Mm-hmm.
Christa Innis: I’m just questioning this venue at this point. ’cause Yeah, with the insurance stuff, they’re very regimented legally. I’ve certainly never heard of that, but
yeah.
Cora Lakey: What up with this venue? Yeah.
Christa Innis: Yeah. All right. It says “by picture time we noticed the groom was already intoxicated, so now the groom is already drunk.
So this Derrick guy’s drunk. The groom is drunk because they have shots everywhere. The ceremony was at 4:00 PM and when guests arrived, sure enough, they each grabbed a fireball shot before taking their seats. The ceremony went on, but the bride looked clearly irritated that our groom was already drunk.”
Well, yeah. I wanna know whose idea it was to have the shots at the wedding. You know, like, is water What?
Cora Lakey: You know what? Like what did you expect? Like a, a, a. Oh my gosh. That’s insane. Yeah. What a nightmare for a venue. Oh my
Christa Innis: gosh. Right. Afterward, “we flipped the space for the reception. At this point, the bar officially opened. Derek made a big deal about how he could finally drink now that we weren’t holding out on him. Dinner was served, dances were danced, speeches were made. And you could already tell the group was sloppy, getting sloppy fast.” See, that’s just a problem like when you, I get wanting to have a party and have fun, but when you already know people have drinking problems or can’t control their liquor, and then you hand out shots before the wedding, before pictures, it’s like people are not gonna make it to the end of the night. Like not gonna be good.
Cora Lakey: I feel like a lot of venues have no hard liquor policies because of this, right? Because accidents happen and people get super drunk and there’s drama. Or at least like the venue has to serve it. I think. So again, questioning this venue a little bit, like why are they allowing this?
Christa Innis: Yeah. Why are they allowing this? And then breaking the rules. And again, I really wanna know whose idea it was to the shots, because it sounds to me like the groom maybe has some kind of drinking problem, but like why would the bride agree to having shots? Or maybe he’s like, oh, I’ll be fine. Like don’t worry.
It’s like, mm. Will you, will you be okay? Yeah. I mean, even my venue,
Cora Lakey: I was shocked because we had a no heart liquor policy, I think. ’cause it’s like Napa Sonoma. I’m not sure if that’s the whole area, but our venue did and people snuck in canteens and they snuck in vodka and stuff. And I was like, how much are these people drinking?
My God. Like why do they need this? Know what I mean? And it’s something I hear at every wedding and it’s true. It’s like you can’t rely on the fact that people are going to be a hundred percent sober. Cra. It’s a huge issue in this country, obviously, but it’s crazy how even on your wedding day you do have to think of stuff like that.
Like all the logistics.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I know. So you can’t control what everyone drinks before the wedding. You would just hope people that are in the wedding, especially your groom, is like, okay, I am not, I’m gonna wait to drink until after to like dancing. But yeah, okay. Oh my God, I just, okay. It says, “then came cake cutting. The groom was so intoxicated that he couldn’t stand on his own.” Oh my gosh. He can’t even stand, stand up. I would be really actually marrying this person right now.
Cora Lakey: And isn’t the cake cutting? I mean, I guess it depends on the wedding, but before or after the first dance. Because was he able to do his first dance?
Christa Innis: I know. I feel like it’s typically when you first walk out, sometimes it’s right before dances, but either way. Yeah. How is he going to, he’s not gonna be doing that. What a
Cora Lakey: nightmare.
Christa Innis: My gosh. “The venue owner had to literally hold him upright just to get one decent photo and a slice of cake.” The venue owner is holding him up.
Oh my God. ” The bride she broke down crying and ran off.” Oh my gosh. I feel so bad for her. That is like, it makes me wonder too, like what signs were there ahead of time? Did she know he had some kind of drinking problem or like were his groomsmen, like the culprits and they were, I mean obviously no one can like make you, but were they like bringing shots in and just like pouring, like doubles?
Like it makes me really wonder.
Cora Lakey: Oh, that’s awful. I still like, for anyone who listening who hasn’t worked in the wedding industry, like the venue is liable if anything happens to the couple on site, and especially if people are driving drunk, there’s investigations that go into that stuff. And if they can track that happens at the venue, the venue can be in huge trouble.
Right. So that is really concerning me. Again, third time I’m questioning this venue. ’cause What do you mean the venue holder is like owner’s holding him upright. Like, why are we not calling paramedics so we don’t get sued? Like this is crazy.
Christa Innis: Yeah. There is a lot of liability that to think about.
I feel like as a venue. Yeah, I don’t know. It says, “not long after a little boy maybe six or seven, walked up to the bar and asked for a beer. For who? We asked. For my dad. He’s the groom.” So now he’s sending his child to the bar to get alcohol for him. Oh my God. Why are they still serving? Why is the wedding still going on?
I, he just like passed out somewhere. This is wild. Where is this? We need more details. We told him we couldn’t serve minors. “The boy walked away, went back to his dad, and then the groom stormed over yelling that we wouldn’t give his son a beer.” In what world do you live in where you can just have your son walk to the bar and get a beer for you?
“We explained we can’t serve anyone underage, no matter the situation. And he said, well, he gets beers from me at home all the time. Then grabbed his own drink and walked away. All of the staff just looked at each other like, did that just really happen?” This guy sounds a real piece of work.
Cora Lakey: This poor staff. Hopefully this gives people some grace for wedding vendors and what they go through, because this is unfortunately not uncommon.
Christa Innis: Mm-hmm. Yikes. Oh no. Okay. Then she goes, “and then there was Derek at one point we saw him crawling around on the dance floor, why his glass eye had popped out.” So, where do you live? Where is this? What the hell? it says why, why does he,
Cora Lakey: I hope this man’s okay.
Christa Innis: He’s just drunk, crawling around on the floor, looking for his eye. God, it says he picked it up, rinsed it off, and popped it right back in. Um, thank you. You’re done with a fireball.
Cora Lakey: I love it.
Christa Innis: Yeah.
Cora Lakey: Priorities are straightforward, man. Clearly.
Christa Innis: Later he climbed onto a chair, stroking the linens hanging from the ceiling. Lantern in one hand, swaying like he was in his own private concert. Why is no one stopping him?
Cora Lakey: Where is his wife? She has stormed off. Why are we not looking for her?
Christa Innis: This is the Derek guy, the guest.
Oh. Oh my God. Wait, I thought
Cora Lakey: that,
Christa Innis: okay, that makes sense.
Cora Lakey: Who are these people need to be studied? Oh my God.
Christa Innis: by the end of the night as he staggered out to his car, why are people just watching him drive to his car? Someone noticed he had lost the glass eye again. This time in the horse pasture next to the venue.
That sentence is very troubling to me because it sounds like he drove himself home and presumably with one eye drunk in with one eye, with one
Cora Lakey: eye drunk. You know what? this venue needs to be shut down immediately. Immediately. Yeah. You guys are, our wedding venue is watching this go down, not calling the police.
Christa Innis: Yeah. What’s
Cora Lakey: going on?
Christa Innis: Well, these drunk people getting into their cars, like, come on, what are we doing here? she said, the next day, I have no idea what happened. I never saw Derrick again and never saw the couple again either. But let’s just say when you work weddings, you really do see it. All the good, the bad, and the downright unbelievable.
And this wedding was definitely one for the books. I big, big problem at weddings. But this just sounds like, people like this ruin it for everybody else. This poor bride ran away crying. We don’t know what happened to her. are her And the groom still together beats me. I couldn’t be with someone after that.
Cora Lakey: No. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. I have no words. I would like an update on this one if you can find one. Maybe if you’re a vendor, try to access the records,
Christa Innis: Okay. This will be my hope. We’re gonna read this story. The story’s gonna come out, the bride is gonna hear the story, and she’s gonna be like, that’s about me.
I need to write my perspective. Or maybe a bridesmaid so it’s not like directly. And then we can get a full update. So I need a glass. Hi. Talk to your thing.
Cora Lakey: Who could forget the glass eye and the horse pasture? Wow. Yeah, I know.
Christa Innis: I feel like those are some good clues. so people that are listening, I mean, people find everyone on TikTok, right?
Cora Lakey: I mean, they find the Coldplay couple, they find, you know. People can find the glass eye guy. Maybe he will write. Reach out to John. Yes. Let us know that, that you’re alive and well. and maybe stop drinking and driving.
Christa Innis: Yeah. With
Cora Lakey: a glass eye. You know, I’m gonna hope maybe look out for others, if not.
Christa Innis: Yeah. I’m gonna hope he was just walking to his car to get like an overnight bag and then get in the Uber or something. I’m just gonna hope that was me too. Yeah. You say positive.
The Wedding Confession Session
Yes. Okay. I know we’re a little over time. I’m just gonna end with some confessions. People always send me some wild confessions, so here we go.
This one says,I just wanted one of my sisters as my maid of honor. “My mom said all five of my siblings had to be in the wedding.” I mean, I guess it depends on how close you are but if it’s like, but boys and girls and your grooms not close to your brothers, how you can’t really make him have them.
Right?
Cora Lakey: It depends on if mom’s paying, right? I guess unfortunately, if mom’s paying mom gets a say, but oof. Yeah, that’s tough. I have a bunch of siblings and yeah, I think I had two sisters is bridesmaids. But yeah, we all vary in ages and closeness, so there was no way. So yeah, I think something I’ve really learned as I’ve gotten older is our parents’ decisions aren’t necessarily our decisions and that’s okay.
And like if you aren’t as close to some siblings, It’s not your fault, Yeah. Especially if there’s like huge age gaps if you have five siblings. I’m assuming so. yeah. Yeah. But don’t accept money if you aren’t comfortable with something like that. For sure.
Christa Innis: Yes. But I also agreed too, or also think too, that like money’s not an indicator of them being able to control has to be given as a gift.
But, to your point too, is like if they are making it clear, because I’m giving you money, I make these decisions, then yeah, we’re gonna like, no, we don’t need your help then, and we’re gonna just do a small wedding.
This one says, “I found my dream dress on Etsy, and my mom said I couldn’t get it because my back fat would hang out.” Oh, what?
Oh, oh my God. I’m, I’m so
Cora Lakey: sorry. Yeah.
Christa Innis: That would be an uninvite for me. Like, yeah. Someone that’s supposed to make you feel good and beautiful, and then make a comment about your body.
Cora Lakey: That’s awful. Oh my God. And you’re gonna be thinking about that your whole wedding day now too. Which is so sad. No matter what dress you end up wearing.
Christa Innis: Ugh. Yeah. What a terrible mom. I know. Like, why would you make that comment? Like, Ugh, I hate that. this one says “my wedding was rushed. My dad was dying. Mother-in-law told me, wait for him to die and plan a proper event.” That is terrible. What. Why does the mother, oh my God, that’s okay to say
Cora Lakey: Evil family members. What is this? Oh, that’s awful. Of course you want your dad at your wedding.
Christa Innis: Yeah, that’s awful.
Christa Innis: Like the fact that she’ll have those memories and like pictures with him, like, oh my gosh, that’s terrible. Okay. let’s do one more. “My stepmom tried to guilt me into having my abusive alcoholic bio Dad, walk me down the aisle.”
Oh my God. I mean I feel like that just goes back to like, don’t do anything that you don’t wanna do for your wedding. anything especially that makes you uncomfortable or not happy on your wedding day.
Cora Lakey: I walked myself down the aisle ’cause my dad passed away. And yeah, I feel like I had a, similar situation where people were just giving me.
Crap about it. And I was just like, this is my wedding. Why does anyone have to give me away? It’s such an old fashioned tradition, and if you wanna do that, that’s fine, but it should be representative of what you want. Whether that’s giving yourself away or someone you’re equally close to even a friend, even sisters.
Mm-hmm. People walk their dogs down the aisle like that doesn’t have to be the tradition. Like no.
Christa Innis: Right. Yeah. I know I took that sentence out of our wedding about like, do your parents give you away? ’cause I was like, I’ve been out on my own, like for years at that point. My now husband, but like, we’d already been living together for like four or five years at that point.
So I’m like, they’re not giving me away. I’m my own person out in the world already. You know? So that just felt like a weird dated phrase for me. Yes.
Cora Lakey: Yeah. There’s a lot of data traditions in weddings that I think we need to analyze, and if your family’s giving you crap about it, it’s like, why do they need to be there?
You know what I mean? Like your family should be making you feel good on your wedding day, and if they’re not and they’re causing drama, it just seems like a lot. I mean, it’s just the tale is old as time with families causing drama at weddings. It’s just like analyze your closeness with these people and it’s good to know for the next phases of life of like, okay, check.
I don’t need Aunt Susie at this or that event because she’s gonna cause drama. So it’s good to know, but it still sucks.
Christa Innis: Yeah, no, for sure. That is wild. I feel for all these brides and grooms and whoever else I have to deal with, that kind of stuff because it’s just, learning boundaries I think is like a really big thing.
And When you realize that having a boundary is not mean, it’s just making yourself more, I don’t know, maybe at peace or something. I don’t know the right term, but like it’s just taking care of yourself. Having boundaries and they’re not mean because as they’re recovering people, pleaser, I feel like for the longest time I was like, oh, boundaries are so mean.
I can’t have boundaries. But like it’s healthy. Like you need to have boundaries.
Cora Lakey: I think the people who push your boundaries always have the strongest boundaries, which I find very ironic and something that I’ve learned in the last several months. It’s like, why can these people have the strongest boundaries in the world? Or just walk all over me, but then when I push back, they act like it’s the biggest deal in the world.
It’s very interesting. That’s a’s very interesting. So start to analyze that, those relationships.
Christa Innis: Yeah, it’s almost like the opposite where they like weaponize the boundary, right? Like they are able to have the strong boundary, but they don’t respect the same for other people. So that’s,
Cora Lakey: yeah. I’m a big proponent of, you need to give the equal energy that you’re capable of taking.
And I definitely had some situations with my last relationship and like in-law stuff where things were, said to me that I would never, if I said that back, like it would be World War iii. Right? And it’s like, why do you think that’s acceptable to speak to me that way? And it’s always so interesting you see.
Adults emotional maturity. When you do give it back to them where you do question their behavior, you start to see a lot of waterworks and a lot of triangulation and things like that. And I think it’s hard with these family situations, but they do make you stronger on the other side of them, and they do force you to have those boundaries, even though it sucks to have to have them, they’re there for a reason.
That’s a buzzword for a reason. So
Christa Innis: yeah, boundaries are like everywhere now, I feel like. And it’s just about like using them in the right way to, you know, ah, bridge a gap, I think.
Cora Lakey: And your wedding day is the right way and the right day. So a big proponent, do what you want at your wedding. Yeah. Who cares what anyone says online in real life, your family.
Otherwise it’s for you. And think about why you’re doing it for the right reasons.
Christa Innis: Yes, absolutely. I love that. Well, thank you so much for coming back on Cora. It was so great hanging out with you. Sorry for all the internet issues. I don’t know what’s going on over here. I gotta figure that out.
Thanks for having me
Cora Lakey: again. Let’s do it a third time.
Christa Innis: Yes, you are always welcome back on. I’ve got like so many stories that are sent to me. So like me, we’re just constantly rolling them out. So anytime you wanna come back on. Love it. Well again for anybody I would love to. Awesome. Well, again, for anybody that’s listening, where can they follow you?
and what kind of content and all that good stuff do they see?
Cora Lakey: Yeah, you can follow me on TikTok at Cora Lakey or my Instagram, Cora Lakey. I think different handles since the last time I was here. And yeah, I talk about my life kind of healing from, starting over. I’m started over at 30 and kind of talking about all the challenges, all the changes that I wasn’t expecting.
So it’s been a wild ride and would love to have you along. Awesome. Well
Christa Innis: thank you again for coming on, Cora.