Think weddings are all love and laughter? 

In this episode, Christa spills the tea with Liz Fleming, life coach and founder of The Small Town Social, on setting boundaries and surviving wedding drama. From hosting epic events to managing moments that make you go “Did that really just happen?” Liz brings her A-game with hilarious stories and savvy advice.

The pair dives into juicy listener confessions, from overbearing in-laws to cringe-worthy pre-gaming fails at dry weddings. Liz breaks it all down with tips for staying cool, calm, and collected while keeping the good vibes rolling.

Whether you’re tying the knot, hosting a bash, or just here for the gossip, this episode will have you laughing, learning, and maybe even rethinking that bouquet toss.

Episode Chapter Markers

00:00 Introduction 

01:26 Career Pivot and Life Coaching

03:13 Setting Boundaries and Event Hosting

04:43 Wedding Stories and Hot Takes

22:07 Wedding Day Drinking Dilemmas

24:08 Biggest Wedding Regret

27:10 Story Submission: Wedding Planning Woes

39:01 Weekly Confessions Game

Must-Hear Insights and Key Moments

  • Liz shares her journey from PR to life coaching and her passion for personal development.
  • Discussion on the importance of setting boundaries in weddings and events.
  • Juicy listener stories about overbearing in-laws and dry wedding dilemmas.
  • Wedding speech disasters and how to handle unplanned drama.
  • Liz’s advice on creating meaningful, joyful events while maintaining personal boundaries.
  • Insights into the cultural expectations of big weddings versus intimate gatherings.
  • Hot takes on viral wedding trends and why authenticity matters.

Words of Wisdom: Standout Quotes from This Episode

  • “Boundaries are so crucial—they not only set the tone for your gatherings but also let everyone, including you, have fun.” – Liz Fleming
  • “The most satisfied people are the ones who follow their gut, set boundaries, and stay true to their vision.” – Liz Fleming
  • “It’s okay to involve your audience in events, but always have a plan—otherwise, it can totally spiral.” – Liz Fleming
  • “If your wedding day puts such a financial strain on you that you’re going to enter your marriage with such a level of stress, it’s not worth it.” – Liz Fleming
  • “I think it’s really important to respect people’s choices for their wedding, whether it’s big, small, or something in between—it’s their story.” – Liz Fleming
  • “Boundaries are the name of the game—respectful no’s are a form of self-care.” – Christa Innis
  • “It’s your wedding, not an entertainment reality show. Stay authentic to your relationship.” – Christa Innis
  • “Weddings are so personal, and I feel like when couples stick to what makes sense for them, that’s when the magic happens.” – Christa Innis

Mentioned in the Episode

About Liz

Liz Fleming is a multi-passionate entrepreneur, life coach, and founder of The Small Town Social, a personal development community focused on empowering women. With 20 years as an award-winning PR professional, Liz pivoted her career to help ambitious women step into their power and live joyfully. 

Through coaching, hosting events, and her annual gathering, GlowCon, Liz helps women gain clarity and confidence in all areas of life. As a military spouse and mom, she brings a relatable, results-driven approach to guiding others toward transformation.

Follow Liz Fleming:

Join the Drama with Christa Innis:

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Submit your story today: Story Submission Form

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A Team Dklutr Production

Blog Transcript:

Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies

Christa Innis: Hi, Liz. Thank you so much for coming on. 

Liz Fleming: Hey, Christa. It’s so nice to see you. 

Christa Innis: Yeah, I know. I feel like we were just talking before recording, but I feel like time has gone so fast, and also feels like the blink of an eye. It’s like, time is so weird now.

Liz Fleming: Yeah. Time’s weird, but we just move on. We move through.

Christa Innis: We do. It just flies by. I’m so excited to have you on. Like I said, I thought of you right away because you are the host of your own podcast. You host events. You are so multifaceted. And so I thought you would be the perfect person to have on here and share your own hot takes. 

And we’re going to play some games as we kind of go through. But first and foremost, can you kind of just share a little bit about yourself and what you do?

Liz Fleming’s Journey

Liz Fleming: Sure. Yeah, of course. I’m so excited to be here. This is going to be so much fun. It’s been a while since I’ve done a podcast interview, so I’m getting my juices flowing again, and the reason for that is that I have been in the thick of a total career pivot.

So as you know, Christa, because we used to do a lot of fun projects together, I was a publicist for 13 years. And I was presented with an opportunity to kind of slow down in my career, and I saw that as an opportunity to totally pivot and become a life and success coach.

So right now it’s just been amazing. You know, when you get that full-body feeling that you’re doing what you’re supposed to do. So I help women realize their purpose on purpose and realize their worth. And we can cover things from career, life, relationships, love, finances, whatever.

But the core of what I teach is really just helping women come back to wholeness so they can live more joyfully. And I have a set formula and a way that I do that. But, yeah, I’ve been in the thick of getting my certifications. So, I’m coming out on the other side of that and I’m just hitting the ground running. It’s just been amazing.

Christa Innis: I love that. I love that because I feel like what you said about when you find that purpose, that thing that really excites you, that is just like, cause it doesn’t feel like work. It just feels like, Oh, I get another day of doing this exciting thing and helping people and having a full impact, which is amazing.

Liz Fleming: Yeah, yeah, totally. And I forgot to mention too, like The Small Town Social, which you’re very familiar with, which is my women’s personal development group that kind of inspired the whole pivot to coaching because I host an annual gathering for women to focus on their self-healing. It just felt like coaching was my natural next step. So I have a lot of experience in event facilitation, which is going to make our conversation here really fun today. Yes. Yeah. It’s been awesome though.

Christa Innis: Yeah. Well, and as you’re talking too about what you do and your, like, how you kind of pivoted, that is perfect too because, and all these kinds of skits and stories that I share on my channel, it’s all about setting boundaries.

So many times these women have to deal with very difficult relationships or hard situations when growing up, they were taught to just be a people pleaser, just say yes, or just do what they tell you. And as we get older and we say no to things, we’re either told we’re difficult or we’re the B word.

So part of sharing these skits is like, you can do things respectfully. You can say no respectfully. So I feel like this is, you’re the perfect match to be talking on this podcast because you can share your take when it comes to setting boundaries and following your path of like, okay, that doesn’t serve me anymore. So let’s go this way.

The Power of Boundaries and Crazy Event Stories

Liz Fleming: Yeah, of course. And that’s so spot on. And it’s so funny you mentioned that because I just did a whole podcast episode about setting healthy boundaries, specifically around the holiday season, but they really apply to life in general.

And especially when you’re hosting an event, whether you’re a bride, you’re hosting a birthday party, or someone like me who hosts large-scale events. Boundaries are so crucial, and they really help not only set the tone for your gatherings but also set you apart and allow everyone, including yourself, to have fun. So important.

Christa Innis: Yeah. I love that. So with that being said, let’s jump into my first segment here, which is any crazy stories, and then we’re going to get into wedding hot takes.

So right off the bat, I know we were kind of talking, and you said just like leading events, you kind of have different, you’ve seen different things, or you’ve seen it all just being at different things.

Do you have any crazy stories that come to mind or anything you’ve heard that you were kind of like, kind of shocking or like, oh my goodness?

Event Hosting, Wedding Speeches, and Hot Takes

Liz Fleming: What’s sticking out for me as an event host is I love to involve my audience in my gatherings as much as possible. I don’t like to stand on a stage all day and talk to the audience. I’ve done that before, and, you know, it works for everyone. They learn a lot, but it was just like—so over the last 6 and a half years of doing these events with The Small Town Social, I have really involved my audience, but you have to be cautious with that.

So things like passing around the microphone and doing group shares—you guys can totally apply this to wedding speeches and stuff—be so cautious about doing things like that. Have a plan. Don’t just go free for all and start doing the group share or letting someone have the mic and do a speech because it can really get away from you.

There’s not really one instance; I mean, it’s happened loads of times for me, which is terrifying. Someone is either too scared to talk, the microphone’s pressed into their face, and there’s not much you can do about it, or they’re nervous to start talking, and then they talk and don’t stop talking.

That’s a really big one where you’re just kind of like, “You need a game plan for that.” I have kind of a seasoned approach now, but for anyone interested in hosting events, or you have an event on the horizon, that’s like my number one thing: totally involve your audience so they have fun, but proceed with caution.

Christa Innis: Yes. Oh my God. I’m so glad you said that because that was something I shared. I don’t remember where I shared it now—it might’ve been in a story somewhere—but I was at a wedding once. I was a bridesmaid, and at the last minute, I want to say it was like a few weeks before the wedding, she brought on another bridesmaid. They had a falling out and then became friends again.

And the girl right off the bat was like, “Alright, I’m giving a speech,” like didn’t wait to be asked, just told her, “I’m going to give a speech,” and this bride was so nice, and she was just like, “Okay,” just accepted it. And after this bridesmaid made her speech, she goes, “Anyone else have anything to say?” which I was just like, you know—no.

Lines started forming of siblings of the bride and groom, cousins—we were sitting there for probably 30-45 minutes just listening to these unplanned speeches. And they were, like, not—you know, like, there are certain things you say and don’t say in a speech, and they were just saying everything. They were talking about sibling fights growing up, how they had a terrible falling out growing up, and why they did, and it was just like, “Is this really happening?”

Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. That’s so bad.

Christa Innis: That was so bad.

Liz Fleming: That’s like my nightmare. Actually, that is giving me flashbacks to my wedding because, yeah, more people made speeches than we knew. It was just kind of like, “Okay, all right.” It’s a boundary between respecting people, but also like, “I paid for this. This is my day,” kind of thing.

As long as you have a plan—like with how I run my events, I have outs. I have certain phrases that I say, and I’m very well-versed in how I present my body language. There are ways you can do that to change a conversation and change a vibe. You send the signal, right? The bat signal.

I have an amazing team helping me with these events, who are also well-versed in that. It makes it a lot easier to just kind of be like, “Okay, we’re going to take a pause here.”

The other reason why that’s scary is probably the most obvious—we live in a very sensitive time right now where everyone has different opinions, views, and thoughts on everything, and you just never know what someone’s going to say. I’m not trying to scare everyone away from the group because it is so powerful. Keep doing them. Just have an anchor—keep people focused.

Even, I mean seriously, for any event, you can do this. For weddings, keep it positive, keep it light. Focus on one thing, one memory. Don’t go down the rabbit hole of everything. And the same goes for more of a life-business-related event like what I do.

Christa Innis: Yeah. And I want to get to hot topics in just a second. But what you just said reminded me of this thing I saw—when you said there’s so much going on, like, we’re very opinionated, right?

I saw this TikTok where someone was sharing—and again, I don’t know what things I should say or not say yet—but in the bride’s father-of-the-bride speech, he talked about the election. He was so happy and came out wearing a hat, and I was just like, no, no, no.

And I guess she knew she had feelings that he was going to do this and was like, “Do not do it.” So she had already told him, “Do not do it.” And he still did it and made this about the election and not about her wedding, which I was like, “Come on!”

Liz Fleming: So that hurts. That hurts. It hurts a lot.

Christa Innis: Oh yeah. So that being said, let’s jump into some wedding hot takes. So I’m going to ask you a couple of questions here that are labeled as some kind of hot takes and tell me what you think.

Okay, let’s see. What is one wedding trend that you think needs to be retired for good and why?

Wedding Trends, Big Day Decisions, and Boundary Battles

Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. I think—oh, am I going to get canceled for saying this?—I think it’s like the elaborate aisle stuff. Like, can we just get down the aisle? Does it have to be an elaborate dance thing or, you know?

Christa Innis: Choreography, like a choreography dance or something?

Liz Fleming: Yeah, and maybe those are already over. I haven’t seen them in a while, but I just remember there was a time when they were the thing. And, I don’t know, how long have I been married? Seven years? Six years? Five years? I remember when I was planning my wedding, I was like, that’s not happening.

I feel like it’s more about the extreme displays of entertainment going viral. Because everyone’s recording people at the wedding, and I just miss when it was intimate and personal. Now it’s like a reality show sometimes, and I think that’s what needs to go. That’s what I’m trying to get at.

Christa Innis: Yeah. No, I totally see what you mean because I think we’re losing sight of what makes sense for our relationship and our wishes instead of going viral. You totally hit the nail on the head with that because I was just talking to someone about how we’re so caught up in what everyone else wants for our wedding day that we lose sight of it, like, “Wait, that doesn’t make sense for me.”

Like, I would never do that. Or when parents come in, they want to invite 500 people. It’s like, “Well, I’m very introverted, so that’s really uncomfortable for me.” The same way it’s like, “Oh, let’s do this viral dance so that maybe we have a chance of blowing up on TikTok.” Why? Why do you ask yourself, why do you want that?

Liz Fleming: Yes, exactly. It’s like the gender reveals—they’ve gone too far.

Christa Innis: Starting forest fires in California. Like, let’s not do that, people.

Liz Fleming: Yeah.

Christa Innis: We can just do it the old-fashioned way—bite into a cupcake or something. If you really need to, just have the baby and move on.

Liz Fleming: Just have the baby.

Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. Okay, that was a good one. Do you think big weddings are worth the expense, or would you recommend keeping them small and intimate?

Liz Fleming: That’s totally subjective. I don’t want to crush anyone’s dreams. If someone wants a huge wedding, I think that’s awesome.

I personally feel that if your wedding day is going to put such a financial strain on you that you’re entering your marriage with a level of stress that takes away the joy, then it’s not worth it. I’m an advocate for small and intimate weddings that are messy, joyful, and true to the couple.

I think it’s really up to you, obviously, and your budget. Weddings have gotten so expensive. I know people who’ve done destination weddings for that reason. They’re like, “Well, if we’re going to spend big money, we’re just going to go overseas and do it.” That often makes it smaller and more intimate because fewer family members can go.

So, there’s this hybrid segment of weddings now, which I love. I’m like, that sounds fun. Maybe for our 10-year anniversary, we’ll do something awesome like that. But yeah, I’m all for being small and intimate at the end of the day.

Christa Innis: I think you make a really good point. It kind of ties back to people trying to impress others and not staying true to themselves.

If it’s in your budget or always your dream to have a big wedding, do it. Go all out. But if you’re going to be in $50,000 of debt, maybe rethink it. At the end of the day, the wedding is about celebrating your love, not pleasing everyone else.

Liz Fleming: You also have to consider cultural perspectives, right? In some cultures, big weddings are the norm, and there’s no other way. Like, that’s what you do. Conversely, some people don’t have big families, so they compensate by inviting all their close friends.

For them, a big wedding is worth it to bring all the people they care about together. So many variables go into the why behind someone’s wedding size. I’d love to see more people being respectful about it. You never know someone’s story or their why.

Christa Innis: A hundred percent. I always find that people who tune out the noise when planning and do what’s true to them are the most satisfied with their wedding.

So many people listen to everyone but themselves, then say, “I wish I could have a redo. I hated that it was so big, or so small.” Listen to your heart and plan for you.

Liz Fleming: Yeah.

Christa Innis: Boundaries. Yes. Boundaries are the name of the game. Okay, next topic.

Christa Innis: The next segment is called “Pick a Side: Wedding Drama Debates.” So, I started asking social media to send me their unpopular opinions. I’m going to read a few, and we can debate them.

The first one says, “I don’t like the idea of a first look. My husband had to wait to see me until I came down the aisle.”

Liz Fleming: Well, I am all about shock and awe, so I don’t love the first-look thing. It’s really like, I don’t know, it feels like it kind of defeats the purpose. I get it, it’s nice to have that one-on-one moment. But to have that moment together, like, in front of everyone you care about, it sends out an energy that cannot be replicated. It’s like next-level good vibes, and I feel like the world needs more of that, so I’m in the camp of no first look.

Christa Innis: Yeah, if I had to pick one, I would say no first look, too. We didn’t do a first look because I was like, I always pictured that first walk down the aisle. It just seemed more climactic for me. But I get it—like people that have done it for timing purposes or scheduling, or maybe they were really shy and just wanted to get it out of the way.

Christa Innis: Okay, this next one says, “I hate the bouquet toss after 25. Nobody wants to be fighting for a bouquet.”

Liz Fleming: Oh, I don’t know. Twenty-five? Twenty-five? Holy crap. So young. I love the bouquet toss. I think it’s a great way to gamify your day. At that point, you’re more than halfway through the day. Your people have eaten, your guests have eaten, and the dancing is starting to happen. It’s just fun and fast, quirky, and doesn’t take up a lot of time. Do it.

Christa Innis: Did you have anyone push people out of the way, elbowing others, or maybe you didn’t see it as the bride?

Liz Fleming: Not aggressively. It was just a kind of jockey. Everyone was a little tipsy. I’ve been pushed out of the way at weddings I attended—it’s been like a mosh pit sometimes—but at my wedding, it was tasteful.

Christa Innis: Some people get really into it. I was scratched once, and it was so intense. Like, guys, it doesn’t mean you’re actually gonna get married next!

Liz Fleming: Yeah, you know your people best. You know your audience. I think that’s something you can pull out of the bag as you see fit. If your guests are likely to get drunk and belligerent, maybe it’s not something you want to do. There are ways to modify those age-old traditions.

Christa Innis: Yeah. And if you’re not athletic like me, maybe don’t do it either. I always worried I’d throw it wrong and knock someone out!

Liz Fleming: Also, if you skip it, you save money on that extra bouquet—like a hundred bucks saved right there.

Christa Innis: Okay, this last one says, “Pregaming a dry wedding is disrespectful to the bride and groom.”

Liz Fleming: Yes. I think that’s super rude. If the bride and groom made that decision consciously, it must be for an important reason. Respect it, then go drink afterward. It’s their day, not yours. Grow up and show up for your people.

Christa Innis: Yeah, I’ve never been to a dry wedding, but if I knew it was dry, I wouldn’t pregame—it’s just weird to me.

Liz Fleming: Yeah, let’s do shots in the parking lot. No thanks. Also, I think it’s weird when people get blackout drunk at weddings. The pictures are ruined, it’s a safety issue, and someone always ends up taking care of them. Alcohol is not the cornerstone of why we’re here.

Christa Innis: So true. I hear stories all the time about someone being so drunk they can’t even walk down the aisle or finish a speech. Let’s just hold off a little if you know you can’t handle it.

Liz Fleming: That was a hard line for my husband and me on our wedding day—no pregaming. I think I had one glass of champagne, and he maybe had a beer, just something to shake the nerves. It’s okay to have a little touch of that, but it’s not about taking away from the day or everything you’ve planned.

Christa Innis: Honestly, I thought I’d have more champagne the morning of, but I didn’t even finish my glass. I was running around so much with hair, makeup, and checking on things. The guys, meanwhile, just had to put on a suit and shower!

Liz Fleming: Same here. I wasn’t even drunk at my wedding—there was just no time. But can I share my biggest regret from my wedding?

Christa Innis: Yes, please do!

Liz Fleming: My biggest regret was putting the bride and groom’s table near the buffet entrance. Why did we do that?

Christa Innis: Wait, so your food table was where you sat?

Liz Fleming: Yeah, it was, but it was spaced out enough that I thought it would be fine. So, we were in a ginormous barn, and it was very elegant, and we had this beautiful, long buffet-style line of food. Our table was on the edge of the dance floor, and there was probably a 10-foot gap between where people went to get the food and our table. I think in my head, I was like, in this way, we’ll:
a) Be able to eat.
b) Get to see more people without having to go around the room so much.

It was a giant event, and because we tried to do that, we only made it to four tables. People just kept talking and talking, and you only have so much time. But then when we sat down to try and eat, it was just like one person after another coming up to us, saying, “Congratulations, we love you guys.” And it’s like, I think I took one bite of food.

I mean, that’s a big expense, and we were so hungry and thirsty. Our cheeks hurt, our hands hurt. That was my biggest regret—not being more mindful of our placement and where we sat.

Christa Innis: Yeah.

Liz Fleming: …Our placement and where we sat.

Christa Innis: That’s such a smart thing to say because I’ve never actually heard someone say that before, but it’s true. You get very drawn into conversations.

I know my husband actually had to stop me because I wanted to go up to everyone. I’m that person who feels guilty and thinks, “Oh my gosh, I didn’t say bye to so-and-so, even though I said hi to them earlier.” And he was like, “It’s okay. There are 150 people here. If you don’t say hi to one person, it’s going to be okay.”

I was like, “Okay.” But yeah, we did this thing called Mission Impossible, which was really cool. It was our photographer’s idea. They played Mission Impossible music, and the DJ announced that we were going to go to each table and take a picture with everyone.

It allowed people to feel like they saw you, and we just quickly moved. One side of the table gets behind the other side, so we could easily just get in there. It made everyone feel like they hung out with the bride and groom for a little bit.

Liz Fleming: Oh, I wish we did that. I feel like there were more than half of the people I didn’t even get to talk to. We had about 152 guests, and I truly thought we’d get around to everyone.

I mean, we tried, and I would have loved to have talked to everyone. Some people I hadn’t seen in years or ever met before, but you can only do so much.

Christa Innis: It’s—

Liz Fleming: …So hard.

Christa Innis: It’s so hard, but as long as you’re having a great time on your day and your guests are also benefiting from that, you’ve won. You’ve won the lottery in terms of the wedding day.

Helicopter Parents and Wedding Hijacks

Christa Innis: Yeah, absolutely. All right. Let’s jump into this week’s story submission.

As a reminder to everyone listening, I get regular stories sent to me all the time. I probably have like 300 that I haven’t even touched the surface on. So, this is a random story that I’ve not read yet. We’re just going to react together. And if you’re listening, thinking, I have a story to submit, you can submit it through the link in the show notes. We’re always taking new submissions.

All right.

When my husband and I got engaged, we were so excited. We were dating for a long time, so we didn’t want to wait too long to get married. We got engaged on May 1st and were talking about getting married around the end or middle of June.

Oh wow, that’s fascinating.

So then my husband could go to some family events with me as a couple at the beginning of July. We sat down with my then fiancé’s parents, and they were asking if we had picked a date for the wedding yet.

I told them we were thinking about June 22nd. They said, “That’s only a month and a half away. We want to have a lot of time to get everything done.”

I told them I knew where I was going to get my dress, and I knew from other family members that getting a dress would be no problem as long as I was going to rent it. I was also going to have fake flowers and make bouquets and boutonnieres myself, so we didn’t need to ask a florist in advance.

Liz Fleming: Yeah.

Christa Innis: Okay.

We were also not going to have our reception at an event center. We were planning on using a church for the reception, so we didn’t need to look for venues.

My father-in-law said, “That isn’t enough time to plan the other things that need to be done. And if we do it on July 22nd, then your fiancé’s older sister and her family, who live in Ohio, might not be able to attend since her husband is in the military. It would be hard for her to leave and come to the wedding.”

My fiancé and I had already talked about possible people who wouldn’t be able to attend the wedding. We came to the conclusion that it was our wedding, and if people couldn’t make it, then they couldn’t come.

My fiancé said, “Dad, we will just give people the date now so they can make arrangements.”

My father-in-law said, “That’s not how it works. You need to have everyone from the immediate family there for the wedding. So why don’t we do July 19th? Then your sister and her husband and family can come to the wedding since they will already be here.”

Why? Because they’re going to Disneyland that week.

Christa Innis: There’s a lot going on here.

Liz Fleming: Oh my God.

Christa Innis: There’s a lot of buildup here.

Liz Fleming: Poor bride.

Christa Innis: I know. Just getting ripped right from her. She knows what she wants. Leave her alone.

Liz Fleming: Yes.

Christa Innis: Oh my gosh.

Christa Innis: Okay, here we go.

“That way you guys can have half of your honeymoon at Disneyland with all of us, which we would pay for. Wouldn’t that be fun?”

My then fiancé said, “Dad, we don’t really want to wait that long to get married since we’ve been dating so long. And we don’t really want to spend half of our honeymoon with you guys since it’s supposed to be just us.”

My future father-in-law said, “Oh, well, you’ll be in your own hotel room. You won’t be in the Airbnb with us in California, which I will pay for. You will also have a couple of days to yourself before the Disneyland trip. So you could go to St. George for a couple of days since it’s on the way to California.”

Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. We should pause there.

Christa Innis: Wow. Helicopter much?

Liz Fleming: Geez.

Christa Innis: Yeah. Like, sure, yeah, that’s a quick engagement, but it sounds like they’ve already talked it through and figured it out. There’s no need to come in and say, “Well, let’s do it this day, and then you can have your honeymoon with us.”

Liz Fleming: Yes, that’s tricky. I’m seeing it from both angles here. The bride and groom know exactly what they want—signed, sealed, delivered. Awesome.

Most parents would be supportive of that. However, I get where the parents are coming from because it’s such a milestone, right? They’ve probably had this grand vision as parents over the last 20 or 30 years of how their child’s wedding would go and how they would contribute. They probably felt totally left out.

Christa Innis: Well—

Liz Fleming: In most weddings, the parents are pretty involved. They love to pay for certain things. It sounds like there was just a massive disconnect in family chemistry when it came to the wedding.

But for the honeymoon thing? That’s creepy. That’s weird.

Christa Innis: Well, and I feel like the weird part of it too is—because I totally get you—it’s like, yeah, they visualize this day and want to help their kid. But it almost sounds like they are catering to the sister and her husband a little bit more.

It’s like, “Well, they have a trip planned to Disneyland, so we should get married right before that.” It sounds like they want the couple to combine their vacation with the sister’s family’s plans to make it more convenient for them.

Liz Fleming: Yeah.

Christa Innis: It’s kind of weird.

Christa Innis: Yeah, it’s like they’re trying to make sure the sister, like the whole family, can be together. But as a military spouse, it doesn’t matter if you give a month lead time or ten months. The military is the military, and they might not be able to attend anyway. Like, they could just get called up for something.

Liz Fleming: Yeah.

Christa Innis: So that’s a little weird to me. But yeah, overall, it felt pretty disrespectful to react that way as someone related so closely to the bride and groom. It’s okay to have your opinions privately and maybe have that discussion. But to just insert yourself so directly into that moment? It just felt like she was being shut down at every turn. The poor thing.

Liz Fleming: Yeah.

Christa Innis: Oh my goodness. And I hope there’s more like—

Liz Fleming: Oh, there’s more?

Christa Innis: There’s more.

Liz Fleming: Oh heavens.

Christa Innis: My fiancé said, “What if we do it on the 27th of June? That’s a weekend, and my sister still might be able to come since it’s a weekend. Then we have two months for whatever other planning we need to do.”

Future father-in-law said, “No, your sister will not be able to come down that weekend either. Ohio is a long way, and it costs a lot of money for her to come down to Utah. July 19th will be best for all of us.”

So again, saying no.

My fiancé then looked at me and said, “We will need to talk about this more than just for a second.” We left the room and talked about what we would want to do.

I said, “I’m really frustrated. I understand if she can’t come, but they are making assumptions that she won’t be able to make it to our wedding. They’re kind of speaking for the sister at this point, not even allowing her to answer for herself. If she really wants to come, I think she can make it happen. If she doesn’t want to come, then she won’t. This is supposed to be our wedding day, not your parents’. I want to get married in June.”

Liz Fleming: Yeah, there’s so much that’s not said in this story. We don’t know the backstory of the bride and groom and why they selected that date. Maybe there was a timeline—financial, career, or health reasons—you just don’t know.

Christa Innis: Yeah, exactly.

Liz Fleming: If anyone in my family ever said something like that to us, I’d be like, “No. What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you high?” I value your opinion, but this is what we decided. Get over it.

Christa Innis: Yeah. Exactly. It almost sounds like a weird control thing because they’re so set in July. And I’m like, what’s the big difference between June and July? To me, nothing.

Liz Fleming: Yeah, nothing. It’s less than a month. And when he said the thing about “I’m paying for it,” that was definitely a power play.

Christa Innis: I hate that.

Liz Fleming: Totally. It’s like, “I’m paying for it, so you’ll do what I want.”

Christa Innis: Yeah, it’s so frustrating.

Liz Fleming: That’s tricky.

Christa Innis: So, after talking, the bride said, “I don’t want to cause drama in your family. And I feel like if we push for the 27th, it will just make things complicated with your parents. I guess we will have to do the 19th and just not make your parents go into a frenzy.”

My fiancé said, “Are you sure that’s what you want to do?”

I said, “It’s not what I want to do, but I guess it’s what we have to do to keep the peace.”

Liz Fleming: Ugh.

Christa Innis: They went back into the room and said, “I suppose we’ll do July 19th.”

The bride added, “I have other stories from my wedding, but this is already so long. Message me if you have any questions.”

Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. That makes me so sad.

Christa Innis: I know.

Liz Fleming: She was a baller about this. She was very clear about what she wanted, set her boundaries, and had the courage to say, “That’s not what I want.” And yet, she’s just put in this tricky position. Imagine if you were in her shoes, up against that mounting pressure from in-laws. Starting off your marriage with that kind of dark energy? Yikes.

Christa Innis: Yeah. I get why she felt the pressure to change her mind, but it sucks that she had to.

Liz Fleming: Yeah.

Christa Innis: All right. I think I did okay with reading that. I have to be honest—one time, I read a confession on Facebook, and someone commented, “Before you post anything, you should make sure you know how to read.”

Liz Fleming: People are so nice.

Christa Innis: Right?

Liz Fleming: That was a really long read. Way to crush it.

Christa Innis: And I should have probably broken it up a little bit.

Liz Fleming: No, I think it was great. I like that you read it in chunks so that we could talk about it along the way.

Christa Innis: Yeah, I’m learning as I go here. Okay, I know we’re overtime, so I’ll make this next section a little shorter. It’s called the weekly confessions game. I’ll just do one confession, and we’ll rate it.

Okay, so these people are sending me their confessions on Instagram now, and we’ll rate it from 1 to build tea and 10 to absolute chaos. And if you have something to add, feel free.

Okay, this is crazy: “My dad was my landlord and told me to use rent as my wedding gift, then made me pay it back the next month.”

Liz Fleming: People are so weird. What the fuck? I guess. I don’t, like, what? Why are you paying it back? That’s not a gift. That’s a loan.

Christa Innis: Yeah, that’s literally a loan.

Liz Fleming: An interest-free loan.

Christa Innis: Positioned as a gift. People are so strange.

Liz Fleming: Yeah.

Christa Innis: Okay, I’m just going to read this other one real quick, and we’ll close out.

“Yes. In-laws insisted on staying at the hotel and then arrived one minute before the entrance of the bridal party.”

Liz Fleming: That’s making a statement.

Christa Innis: Yeah, that was done on purpose.

Liz Fleming: Yeah.

Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. This is crazy. Thank you so much for coming on, Liz. I know. I’m like, what other stories can we read? This was so much fun. I really enjoyed having you come on and catching up. Can you tell us again where everyone can follow you, what other projects you’re working on, and all that good stuff?

Liz Fleming: Yeah, of course. Everyone can find me on Instagram—that’s my favorite. So, you can find me at @thesmalltownsocial on Instagram or at @MsLizFleming. I have two accounts.

And then, yeah, all the links are there. I share a ton of content. You can work with me one-on-one in coaching.

I think the biggest thing I have coming up, even if you’re not local to North Carolina, is a women’s personal development gathering called GlowCon on March 20th, 2025. The majority of women are here in North Carolina, but I have some women flying in from as far as Ohio, California, Washington, Virginia, and Vermont.

So it’s really grown. This is the second time I’m doing it, but it’s such a beautiful day of community, connection, getting to know yourself better, and just having some fun on the first day of spring.

So, a lot of stuff going on for little ol’ me, but I would love to connect with you all, and this has been wonderful, Christa. Thank you.

Christa Innis: Of course! Yay, I’m so excited. This is awesome.